It has come the whole way through, it seems. First I thought love didn’t exist (except as chemical reactions). Then I thought I was “too rational” to feel it (har har). Then I thought I would never find it, at least in the foreseeable future. Then oops.

Hazuki once said how she and Rachel got lucky to basically fall into each other’s arms. I guess the same happened here.

When Alice is not online, I often feel uneasy and tired, like I have nothing meaningful to do. And when she is, it’s enough to slide my mood-meter into the “happy” or even “ecstatic” zone, no matter how low on the scale it could have been before.

Once again: safe environments prepare for unsafe ones. Roleplayed relationships have prepared me to embrace a real one, where my 21-year-old self would feel utterly clueless. So weird… but in a good way.